The Secret to Work/Life Balance
When the idea of writing for this mom blog was first discussed, I was slightly hesitant because other than sharing my favorite recipes and my overwhelming knowledge of Disney trivia, I wasn’t sure that there was much I could be considered an expert on. So I did what most people in this era would do and asked my social media friends for suggestions. There was a variety of responses to get me brainstorming, but the one that struck me the most actually came from my sister, and it was the request to write about how to balance work and motherhood especially when you work from home. So before we dive into this topic that most, if not all mothers struggle with, I want to share with you a bit of my background so you can connect to where I’m coming from.
For the past 10 years, my life has revolved completely around my home. When we learned I was pregnant with my oldest, I left my job so that I could focus fully on my college courses with the goal of graduating before he made his debut. And after receiving my degree, I made the decision to stay home with my son with the idea in mind that at some point I would go back to the workforce. Fast forward a couple years and I learned that I do not do well when I feel like I’m idling without a sense of purpose, so over the years I have started a number of businesses based on my crafting abilities and products that I fell in love with. They all started as just a way to keep busy until my boys were old enough to attend school, but what I have learned in the process is that the typical office life of working set hours outside of the home just isn’t what I’m made for and doesn’t work for my family. Instead I choose to work from home, and while it has its blessings like the flexibility to attend school field trips and help care for my niece during the school day, it also has its challenges. For example, it’s very easy to get distracted from the writing this post when I have a clear view of the dishes piling up in the sink.
Which brings us back to the topic at hand, how do you go about balancing your work with your life? And to be honest, my answer may shock many of you because I don’t think it’s possible. Now hear me out. When people talk about a work/life balance what most people envision is a perfect life where you spend equal time accomplishing both your work goals and your life goals. But it just doesn’t work that way, because not only are there way more pieces to the puzzle than just work vs life when you start breaking it down into categories like marriage, self-care, family, current job duties, future career goals, etc, but you also have to realize that all of these things are fluid and what they need to function on any given day has as many twists and turns as Rockin’ Rollercoaster.
Regardless of whether you work in an office or at home, there are going to be occasions where more time and energy is required to accomplish the task in front of you. Just like there will be milestones in your life that will require more focus, like the first year of marriage or having a new baby. And this is where most people will get hung up, because this idea of an equal work/life balance tells us that if we need to work overtime one month, that it makes us a bad mom or if we need to leave work early so we can make it to our kid’s football game, then we aren’t a motivated employee/business owner/etc. And it tells us that we aren’t enough because it makes us believe that there are other moms out there that have figured out something we haven’t, when the truth is, none of us are living that perfect equality because it doesn’t exist.
What does exist is harmony. The ability to understand that just because you need to focus on one aspect of your life right now doesn’t means the others will suffer forever. Knowing that you have goals for your future and that taking the time to strive for them now means more flexibility in the long run. Or knowing when you are at the place in your work career that you can take more time to focus on your family. Because in truth, your work/life balance should be just that, a balancing act that allows your time to ebb and flow between your various responsibilities without causing everything to break. The next time you think about your life, instead of picturing a scale, picture a lake. Most days, the water is calm or there may be a slight breeze pushing it to one shore or another. And every now and then a storm will blow in, causing the water to crash in waves and surge to a shore. But just like those storms in nature, the storms of your life (a new promotion at your job or your kiddo starting school for the first time) will not last long and the balance of time and responsibilities will return to your center. So instead of focusing on keeping things equal, focus on your ability to ride out the storm with your goal being the growth and peace that follows it.